Tears that soak a callous heart.

12/10/07

Saw my kid the other day,
but it was really too difficult to pretend,
like rubbing my eyes to remove the truth.
If it’s a sin, who should confess?
If I was born in the same way, how come I survived?
Sometimes it just doesn’t make sense,
actually, it makes no sense,
but I had a life to live so I tried to move.
What the hell does he want with me?
I’ve been a runner forever, how could I change?
So I turned my face and I fucking cried,
yeah, big bad chris wept like rain that fell on scars,
like blood I tried to put back in holes.
If it’s a sin, where should I begin?
Sometimes I just don’t know,
actually, I still don’t know.
Maybe I need a secret weapon,
a way to punish me with gentle pain,
give me enough time to find the Sun and the Moon.
It sure isn’t easy in these streets.
If it’s a sin, why does he follow me?
I thought I would be the one to walk away,
instead I held out my hand,
but my arms flailed in the wind.
As I blinked twice, nothing was there.
I suppose I never really knew what he looked like.
How’s that for second guesses?
and then there were chills I could not shake.
Sometimes it’s like he’s living his life through mine,
actually, it’s his life not mine.
And I know the spirits have cared for me,
more than I could ever ask for,
it’s not just the stars and things.
The spirits found me a heart that I could love,
and it scares me to death.
I don’t want to hurt anymore.
I don’t want to die.
Can he really see me?
I hope you could see me too.
I’m not going to hide these tears.
I’m not going to fade anymore